musings on life, love and laughter from my spoken heart to yours

BAH-HUMBUG… I think… maybe… IDK…


that is one UGLY sweater!!!

that is one UGLY sweater!!!

Well its official it is Christmas time. We cannot hold it back, change it, or wish it away. So ready or not here it comes! There are only 11 days left! Yes you heard that right! ELEVEN DAYS LEFT!!! So there is no point worrying, no point in trying to make everything “even” – all parents know what that means, you know when the gift piles don’t seem to look fair or even – too bad kid suck it up! Anyways all we can do is just brace ourselves and go for it! And it will be what it will be… the good, the bad and the ugly! (Oh yes the ugly… like the sweater you know you are getting from Dear sweet Aunt Edna – Bless her color blind fashion hindered soul)

Truthfully it isn’t all bad, I am actually looking forward to time together as a family. I am looking forward to having a nice dinner together. To eating way too much, playing games and goofing around with those that I love. I am also eager have a few extra days off of work. (Bonus!)



But I am also feeling stressed – even though I know the stress is counterproductive. As I already said it will be what it will be, but I know I cannot give my kids even a fraction of what I want to give them. And even though my kids are good kids and they are grateful I know it will all pale compared to the great built up expectations heaped on via other kids, TV shows, etc.

For me Christmas is the most bittersweet of all the holidays. It is the one that leaves me feeling unsure. I have watched as

Hey it's Christmas lets get DRUNK!!!

Hey it’s Christmas lets get DRUNK!!! – do we need an excuse to get drunk? I guess some do…

depression has devoured the holidays due to the lack of funds and stability. I have seen Christmas be used as method of enforcing competition amongst siblings, and relations. I have watched the way it is used as a license to drink in excess, and over indulge. It can sure be ugly considering it’s “the most wonderful time of the year”…

excessive much?

excessive much?

Truthfully I don’t even really know why I celebrate it the way I do and sometimes I wonder if I could just strip it down to bare bones and start all over again with new traditions and ideas. Make it simpler, less stressful, reduce the expectations.

I keep thinking I should pretend I’m Ukrainian and celebrate in January. Would that help? I have no idea…  but it would be different.


Author: myspokenheart

Blogger, life lover, silly-hearted daydreamer...

16 thoughts on “BAH-HUMBUG… I think… maybe… IDK…

  1. For some reason I can’t find my Christmas spirit this year…and yes…that is one ugly sweater.


  2. I don’t like the sweater – ev’ since you got it, you don’t comment no more, you don’t come see Panda no more – I think that sweater gone done make you think you is better than ol’ Panda now. You got yo’ own bristly hug right there and you don’t need his no more. For shame it sure has break his heart is what it’s done – it sure has…
    He be wantin’ you to have yo’ own crizmas tho’, he still sendin’ the love’ – an he says fuck the world – he got a potty mouth but he never listen to me, he never gonna change. So n’anyways, he says you do whateva’ you want, and tell them kids they got your love even an’ all the time, and that’s enuff fo’ en’one sure as it is, damn.
    They wan’ playstayshun, an fancy mobi-all phone n such, they got’s to jus’ wan it – but they need a hug and momma she come runnin’ – that’s a real gift an it’s all year round.
    I said a mouthful girl – y’all heard enuf.


    • aaawwe my dear sweet ferocious Panda…. firstly I don’t like the sweater either… its major BLEH!!!

      secondly I am still having troubles with my comments and it seems the people working the forums have forgotten all about me (why am I spam?)… 😦

      And lastly I have a real hard time with this time of year – not that I do not like Christmas… but it can be confusing and stressful and there are many demons from the past that must be battled… It has been a hectic few days (weeks) I just needed to withdraw for a bit… but I am feeling like I am getting back on track – playing catch-up now…

      I actually am hating not being able to comment on people’s posts!!! And I do not want to start up a new blog… yours is one of the only ones I can post on – you unspammed me! you wonderful old softie you…

      BIG HUGS and LOVES your way xoxox


      • Sorry it’s a battle Hearty, and I hope you do feel more on track. I can empathise with the struggle. Don’t feel obliged to wear happy on my account! I just noticed you hadn’t been around and worried. My fierce image is in ruins, but hey, gotta keep growing and changing eh!?
        Here’s to finding futures to replace our demons with *chink*
        Some love and hugs back at you 😀


  3. I wouldn’t say the sweater is ugly. It is just style that requires an acquired taste. 🙂

    To keep Christmas simpler, my friends and I stop exchanging presents. We just meet up to enjoy a good Christmas feast and banter.


  4. Christmas with you in it can’t be bad, surely? It’s the love that makes it count…hope yours is peaceful, relaxed and full of that squashy stuff 🙂


  5. I love your this blog and always look forward to your posts 🙂
    they intrigue me…and get me thinking. I adore this time of year, but don’t love the stress of making my money work overtime :/ I think soooo many struggle with that part of Christmas. I’m taking it back a few notches and remembering the true meaning of this time of year…Simple fun loving family time ❤ Loving on others and being thankful for the blessings in life!


  6. I have never ever gotten a sweater like that one – nowhere near anything like that one.. but if I ever do, I’ll love it 😀


  7. thankfully no I did not make that sweater, so you can hate it all you want and I will never be offended!


  8. Love your title… and hate the sweater. Where did you posssibly find something so ugly? Ok so now tell me you made it. LOL


  9. gathers up all the words necessary to make you smile and have the warm cozy feeling flow through you.. puts on a pretty bow and into a gift bag… if only. 🙂

    but you know.. those Christmases that are simple, with a family meal, love smiles and hugs… those really are the best ones. The hype and media get everyone to spend more than they have, so tension of bills follows into the new year.. but all anyone needs is love. That is free. Those corny home made sweaters that are… hmmm interesting *covers my eyes* … home made gifts say more. I guess I just have a students look on it, budgets.. tiny gifts… but lots of love, relaxing, games, snacks and giggles. snowball fights if it snows, walks in the community to see the lights together…

    those are the Christmases you remember, not the gifts.



    • yea the simple low key holidays are always the best… why is it so easy to lose sight of that?

      oooo I like snowball fights and hot chocolates and tiny gifts… 🙂 *HUGGGGSSS* for too hunny


      • interesting question, on how we lost or lose sight on a “traditional Christmas”. It isn’t too late to seek them out again though, start a new tradition… the old tradition. eeeps it is confusing.

        simple is always best, that eludes us though, we always want more glint… But are happiest with simple.

        so simply *hugs* again 🙂


  10. I personally love the sweater 😀 I wish I had written this it is exactly how I feel, the holidays for me are bittersweet as well. I “excessive” in most areas myself over the holidays. Thanks for a great post and again just love the sweater.


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